Before I forget: thank you for all of your inputs regarding the last entry. It was about a friend and I was so sad that she was going to be leaving. She didn’t, her mom gave her (yet) another chance. I just hope that she doesn’t mess this up.
So anyways, I was over Tumblr-land, because it’s awesome like that, and saw a certain little entry on my dashboard. If it were a punch, I would’ve been KO-ed by now. Lame analogy, I’ve had little sleep, sorry.
I’ll quote the part that hit me the most:
You see, in a non-heated conversation I was told by the man I am currently seeing that he would never consider me the type to be committed to. I am the best friend. I am the guaranteed laugh. But I am never the courted, the one to be put on a pedestal, the one to be loved. Let me clarify to save face……I wasn’t asking for anything, and don’t know that I even want anything.
from The AntiKris (entry)
I’m going to be honest, I have never ever considered wanting a boyfriend… ever. You can go ask all the friends and people I grew up with, I’m just not that type of girl. Reading this blog made me feel a bit relieved that I wasn’t the only one who didn’t bother thinking of their dream wedding. To be honest, it always bothered me why I never even think about these shit… until now, I guess.
I still don’t have a dream wedding, a dream date, or a perfect man in mind, but… I may be coming to that point in my life where I want to experience this? Dude, I feel uber-WTF typing this, to be honest, but I can’t help it. I need to let this out somehow? (cheesy, gah.)
I don’t consider myself threatening or intimidating, but upon prodding my friends with questions, I found interesting results. Most of my female friends say I’m one of the nicest yet dorkiest persons they’ve ever met. Guy friends on the other hand say I was intimidating at first…. but was apparently really nice. I’m not intimidating! *indignant huff*
One more reason why I was inspired to make this entry. Almost two weeks ago, a friend told me that the guy I liked asked him why I had no boyfriend, even though I’m apparently really nice. Said friend told me that the guy I like will ask me this. Never did. I guess he’s just not that interested enough. If you do ask, guy that I like, I will tell you exactly why! I am saying this because I have a feeling he will never ask. Sucks.
(Oh, I told my friend I don’t have a boyfriend because I eat boys. He gave me an odd look, haha.)
I’m too stubborn to change myself to be one of the girls guy pursue all the time. All I know is, I’m happy with myself, I think I’m pretty awesome, so why does it feel like sometimes I want to change myself?